Reviews you can use; Wine Episode Fat Bastard

By no means should you take my word for this seriously, I am not a wine expert. This is just a regular man's view on some cheap yet hopefully tasty wine.

So Jane and I just tried a new wine, Thierry & Guy - Fat Bastard Chardonnay. We each had two glasses and while she nursed hers I drank mine like a homeless man looking for a warm night. As you can tell i might be a little buzzed. It was tasty yet a little bitter after the first glass. It was like drinking a good glass of Pine Sol. It definitely left a kick in the corner of your mouth. Jane says "it would go great with a creamy soup."


But it DOESN'T go good with burritos, which is what we had for dinner.

Karl, where are you??

For those of you who know and miss Karl don't worry. It looks as if his vacation was cut short and he is on his way back home. I have cleaned up for him and fluffed his pillow. It looks like he will be staying awhile or forever. Or until the surgery cuts his ulgy ass out.

DAMNIT Karl pay rent or get the hell out.

(For the whole Karl story click here.)

Healthcare or Torture?

So on Friday I drove across town to have a doctor look at the growth that is called Karl.

Everything was going great, will for the first two minutes of the visit that is. The doctor said that it wasn't a tumor (which three other doctors said it was) so YAY for me. So what the hell is it, I said. It turns out that it is a cyst. He said that it was the biggest cyst (in a mouth) that he had ever seen. Of course I said thank you and blushed just a little. It isn't often that someone can impress a doctor with a growth.

The doctor said that it needed to be drained right away. The doctor tried to numb my mouth and tongue. Notice I said TRIED, yeah he failed. As he cut into my tongue and the cyst that was hiding under my tongue I felt ever ounce of pain.

I know this isn't the best blog by give me credit I am high I VICODIN.

What the hell is that under my tongue?

So for the last week or so my tongue has been bothering me. I didn't really pay attention to it til last night. After I finished brushing my teeth I noticed that my tongue hurt. So I thought that I should look and see if I could see something. Well I did see something and it shocked me, under my tongue was what looked to be a grape. (I don't recall eating any grapes.)

So this morning I went to an Urgent Care, the first doctor i saw had no clue what it was. So she called in a second doctor. That doctor didn't know what it is either. So a third, forth, and a fifth doctor came in. After five different doctors looked and poked around in my month for about an hour, they decided that the growth under my tongue is either a cyst or a tumor.

You have to be shitting me a tumor. GREAT ..... what should I name it?

Missing Cervix

Missing: Have you seen Jane's cervix lately? It is missing a piece of it's self. It was last seen on Oct. 24th 2008. Please if you have any information about the missing piece please notify SucidialJane or Me.